Category Archives: Issues regarding US persons abroad

We hear the word ‘narcissist’ a lot these days in articles and media. It has become a popular buzzword used to describe manipulative, controlling people who have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for admiration, a sense of entitlement, and a lack of empathy for others.  According to psychcentral.com, in order for a person to be diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) they must have five or more of the following  symptoms:

• Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)
• Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
• Believes that he or she is “special” and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)
• Requires excessive admiration
• Has a very strong sense of entitlement, e.g., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations
• Is exploitative of others, e.g., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends
• Lacks empathy, e.g., is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others
• Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her
• Regularly shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes

Most experts agree that narcissism exists on a continuum, with some people naturally being more narcissistic than others, such that the defining line between who has a full blown narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) versus who exhibits highly narcissistic traits is not distinct.  Essentially, to some degree, all of us have behaved narcissistically at one point or another.  Regardless whether we are dealing with full blown NPD or a highly narcissistic person, such individuals can cause a lot of pain and chaos in the lives of those they cross paths with.

 Psychologists and therapists say, watch out if you suspect you are dealing with a highly narcissistic person as their personality is typically fixed, and no amount of pleading, explaining or appealing to their non-existent empathy will change their behaviour unless something is in it for them.  Your best bet is to run far away and never look back if you can. If you are forced to deal with them on a regular basis, for example if such a person is your boss or your parent or your spouse, there are ways to make life less chaotic in terms of how you relate to them, but never forget that they are who they are, and will always be who they are.

Is the USA behaving like a narcissist with regards to its ‘US persons’ living outside USA?

Is USA’s insistence on unique to the world, citizenship based taxation (Eritrea doesn’t count), indicative of a grandiose sense of self-importance?

Is USA preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, and does it believe it is ‘special’ and unique, to the degree that it can justify taxation on people who neither live nor work within the geographical boundaries of the United States of America?

Does the USA require excessive admiration by insisting that people who have lived entire lives outside the USA pay tribute to the USA in the form of taxation and the revealing of their so-called ‘foreign’ bank accounts, simply because they were born on ‘special’ US soil?

Does the USA reveal a strong sense of entitlement by insisting that all other countries in the world, at their own expense, hunt down their own citizens living in their own countries, just because USA says these people are its ‘US persons’?

Is the USA being exploitative of other countries by threatening them with economic sanctions if they do not hand over their US born citizens (and other ‘US persons’ as defined by the USA) to the USA?

Does the USA lack empathy for those it deems ‘US persons’ who are typically citizens of other countries living in those other countries, paying taxes already in those other countries, and who cannot live normal financial lives, cannot save adequately for retirement, and are burdened by having to marry two incompatible tax systems?

Does the USA show arrogant, haughty behaviour or attitude by presuming it is OK for it to be the ONLY country in the world(Eritrea doesn’t count) to impose citizenship based taxation, knowing full well that if ALL countries did this, the world would be a financial mess?

Even if FATCA and CBT are struck down, is it safe to remain a ‘US person’ living outside USA, or is your best bet to run to the nearest US consulate and renounce US citizenship to get the narcissist out of your life forever?

While waiting around for the Cavaliers Hawks game to begin I came across this!

http://www.moodystax.com/downloads/Renouncing-Part2-Appendix.pdf

From this:

http://www.moodysgartner.com/renouncing-your-us-citizenship-new-law-may-keep-you-out-forever/

Psychologists describe 5 stages of grief based on the Kubler-Ross model introduced by Swiss psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross in her 1969 book, ‘On Death and Dying’.  Although originally ascribed to the emotional stages experienced due to death of a loved one, the model can also be useful to understand the responses to any subjective trauma that a person may go through, for example a relationship breakup, a job loss, or a ‘OMG! I am a US taxpayer’ moment.

The key here is ‘subjective trauma’.  Many ‘US persons’ know what it is like to have people roll their eyes, yawn, or wonder why we are so worked up, just because we discover we are subject to FATCA (what’s the big deal? You ARE an American!), or because we discover we are US taxpayers (if you don’t like it why don’t you renounce?).  Typically, we do not get the sympathy one would get if we had a serious illness, or lost our job, or divorced our spouse.

Non-US persons for the most part, just do not ‘get’ the ‘US person’ curse, because to be FATCA’d and CBT’d is not within the realm of normal human experiences. We are unique and special in the world that way – thanks to USA’s exceptional treatment of those it deems ‘US persons’. Nevertheless it IS traumatic for those of us who have lived most or all our lives in countries other than the USA, and who have never had a clue we were US taxpayers on our non-US income, to be FATCA’d and CBT’d.

The following are the 5 stages of grief as outlined in the Kubler-Ross model. Keep in mind that these stages are not necessarily linear. One day you may feel like you are angry beyond belief, and the next day you may feel that it just is what it is. Hopefully, at some point, most of your days will fall into the latter category.

Denial.

The first reaction to hearing one has a terminal illness, or their house burned down, or they are subject to the tax laws of a foreign country, is denial. This just CANNOT be for real. It makes no sense. This has got to be wrong. How could I have lived all these years and NOT known I was a US taxpayer? There must be exceptions for people like me who don’t live in the USA. They surely cannot be referring to ME.

Anger.

Once the initial shock wears off, anger follows. We want to blame someone or something. We may be angry at the doctor who gives us a bad diagnosis, at the driver who caused the accident, or at ourselves for not doing something to prevent whatever bad thing happened. We are angry at the Canadian government for not standing up for us, at our spouse who thinks we are over reacting, at our neighbour who doesn’t want to listen to our rants, at ourselves for not figuring out years ago that we were US taxpayers, or at the American government for acting like it owns us.

Bargaining.

This is the stage where we play games with ourselves, and with others, desperately trying to ‘work it out’ or ‘fix things’, so that we can go back to the way things were before. The person whose romantic relationship is at an end may promise to change their behaviour – anything to not have the relationship end. The dying patient may promise God he/she will be a better person or take better care of himself/herself – anything to not have to die. The newly aware US taxpayer searches for a way to work out their non-compliance: streamlined program? 5 years tax compliance catch-up? – just please don’t penalize me for my ignorance.

Depression.

Reality is setting in now. There is no easy way out. We are not going to bring our loved one back. Our job is gone forever. The relationship is definitely over. No matter which route we take to solving our ‘US taxpayer status’ we are going to pay – whether that be in taxes, compliance fees, penalties, loss of privacy, loss of US citizenship, or by being forced into hiding. It sucks no matter how you look at it, and this just makes us sad.  🙁

Acceptance.

Psychologists and grief counsellors say you are lucky if you get to this point. Many people get stuck in anger or depression for years or even a lifetime – the widower who becomes a recluse when his wife passes away, the mother who mourns a lifetime for the child she lost, the aspiring athlete who never made it to the big leagues and seems forever lost in his former glory years, the ‘hidden’ US person who cannot shake the mental chains of his unwanted ‘US taxpayer status’ even if he has logistically found a way to deal with it. The luckier people at some point accept the reality of what has happened and find a place to put it so that it does not interfere in their daily lives anymore. The widower finds peacefulness alone, or maybe finds new love. The mom, whose child is gone, remembers the happy times she spent with him/her and stops dwelling on what was lost. The US person, finds a way to deal with his/her own particular situation – stays hidden, or becomes tax compliant, or renounces – and moves on with his/her life.

Probably many at IBS have read this article [ read the text, don’t wait for the video ]. May we find a way to respond?

And the naratrice speaks as if the changes are brand new… NOT

http://money.cnn.com/2015/03/10/pf/taxes/us-expat-kids-citizenship-tax/