Introduction
The good thing about bad things is that go away. The bad thing about good things is that they go away. FATCA is a generally bad thing, but a good thing for "Form People". Who are Form People? Why are they the way they are? https://t.co/yZZy0ungNF
— U.S. Citizen Abroad (@USCitizenAbroad) March 19, 2020
Professor Byrnes says that: “FATCA is the force and the force is FATCA”.
The Issac Brock Society has been a consistent critic of FATCA. But, who or what is the Isaac Brock Society?
In a very real sense: “Brock is the commenters and the commenters are Brock”.
EmBee has been one of the most consistent commenters at Brock. But she is more than a commenter. She has also written the lyrics, to the songs, that have become part of the “Brock Choir”. This post is centered largely around an “EmBee Classic” – “Form People”.
No celebration of FATCA would be complete without an acknowledgement of the “Form People”, who have contributed to the idea that:
FATCA is the force and the force is FATCA.
FATACA could not exist without “Form People”.
My last post featured a discussion of Professor Byrne’s description of the true beneficiaries of FATCA. He pointed out that:
What he means is encapsulated by:
“The Force will take care of you with high salaried private firm and corporate employment as well as employment in a government position, or a policy thinktank, and even as an academic.” Inevitably a student brings up tax simplification to which I respond, “Young Skywalker,” “once a Jedi, always a Jedi.” Elaborating, I explain, “Legislation and regulations are written by Jedi, known as tax staffers and Treasury counsel, who have become one with the Force and the Force is strong.”
Professor Byrnes calls members of the compliance industry “Tax Jedi”. In 2014, Brockers called them “Form People“.
Who are “Form People”? Outside looking in
"Form People" Theme Song – adapted by @IsaacBrockSoc composer EmBee on December 17, 2014 – from Goldfinger Theme Song – James Bond https://t.co/COPFxvGm1e via @YouTube
— U.S. Citizen Abroad (@USCitizenAbroad) March 19, 2020
The lyrics of Form People as decreed by EmBee – To be sung to the tune of Goldfinger …
Form People — sing to the tune of “Goldfinger”
Form People
They’re the ones
The ones with a vampire’s bite
A scary sight
Such a cold people
Beckon you to enter their world of fines
You must declineBafflegab they will pour in your ear
But their words can’t disguise what you fear
For the clever ones know how bad this ends
It’s the kiss of death to befriend
Form People
Clever ones, beware of their deeds untold
Their hearts are coldBafflegab they will pour in your ear
But their words can’t disguise what you fear
For the clever ones know how bad this ends
It’s the kiss of death to befriend
Form People
Clever ones, beware of their deeds untold
Their hearts are coldThey love only forms
Only forms
They love forms
They love only forms
Only forms
They love forms
Circa 2014 – Who are “Form People”? – inside looking out
On November 26, 2014 Stephen Kish introduced us to the psyche of “Form People”. Read the post which includes:
“Tricia and Stephen,
You are absolutely right when you say that “Wonderful World of Forms, Threats and Penalties” is completely normal from the perspective of the Compliance Condor. In fact, for most of them, the completion of forms is the fundamental obligation of citizenship (or at least U.S. citizenship).
Furthermore, very few of them see the system of taxes, forms as penalties as being immoral. They just see it as normal.
One could say that the Compliance Condors work “within the system”. But, the truth is that the Compliance Condors “Are The System”.
They make it work. They shape the law. They shape the expectation of the law. Once one Condor begins filing a specific form (example 3520 for the TFSA) the other Condors are sure to follow.
Because Condors are “Inside The Form” looking only at the Form, they can’t imagine what it means to be “Outside The Form” looking in. They can’t see the immorality, the injustice, the waste of human resource and the dehumanizing of the individual. In fact the Compliance Condors “aid and abet” each of these things – they take pride in doing it.
But, there’s much more.
In the “Form Industry” there is a hierarchy of forms. Those who are most experienced assist with the most complex forms.
Imagine the day in the life of a Compliance Condor when he/she reaches the point where he is assigned a 5471 [anyone out there own a Canadian (i.e. “foreign”) corporation?] or an 8621 [how about a single share of a passive investment company?].
After all, those who are most junior would start with an FBAR or perhaps a schedule B. The value of a Compliance Condor is a function of the forms to which he is entrusted. His sense of “self worth” is defined by the form that he is assigned.
A Compliance Condor would start the day by looking the mirror and saying:
“In forms we trust”.
The most dedicated Condors dream of Forms.
But, they do more than dream about Forms. Because their identity is a function of their forms, many of them go further than dreaming about forms. Those who are most dedicated actually dream about being specific line numbers on different forms . In social settings they confide about their dreams to other Condors.
In the industry, these are known as “Form Dreams” .
So, yes when the Compliance Condors write about FATCA, FBAR and other sacred instruments of confiscation, they are being sincere. They believe are being helpful.
They are NOT being dishonest And above all else, they are simply writing about the world they way they see it and the way they experience it.
And that Dr. Reader is exactly the problem!
P.S. Avoid “Form Crime” – The Compliance Condors will love you!”
But especially read the comments, which include some of the best and wittiest comments ever to grace Brock.
The advanced Condors, (those who dream about being specific line numbers on the forms) morph as they walk along those lines and they are led to the Hall of Penalties. This is a vast region where the calculations of the largest and most complicated penalties are encased in frames of gold and jewels, shining for time immemorial. The signature and picture of the IRS examiner designing each unique, model calculation, have been embedded at the top of the Template, so that their contribution will be attributed to their particular genius. Each Hall is presided over by a Guardian Spirit, (one of the many previous Commissioners who excelled at the implementation of regulations having the greatest punitive impact). Of course, the Supreme Spirit of the entire region of the Hall of Penalties, is the exalted H.H.Douglas Shulman, unanimously elected by all the Guardian Spirits to be the most malicious and loathsome of them all. They sing praise to his malevolence and persecution of that most hated of creatures, Tax-Cheats by Birth. At dawn and dusk, all bow to him and chant their vow to always honor Form Crime, the doctrine that both guides and keeps their universe intact.
The next Sphere contains the long lost emails of the enchantress, Lois Lerner……….
It was interesting going back over that “Form People” post and comments — loved the wordplay. Little did Beth Thomas know, back then, how apropos her comment would become in this year of the Novel Crown Virus …
Now whenever is see Lew I’m going to be thinking Loo.